Day 38: Baby Steps Can Carry You Far

“Your leg looks better,” I said, staring at my friend’s knee and calf which were down from the size of a grapefruit to a softball. “Your foot has color again so the circulation must be improving. You appear to be taking baby steps towards healing.”

“Yeah, I’m glad I’m taking less pain pills too,” he replied.

“I’m relieved. After days of caring for you, I wasn’t sure when you’d turn a corner.”

It’s tough being a caregiver, I thought. I’m exhausted and my back is killing me.

The two of us plopped down on the sofa and exhaled for the first time in nearly five days. We listened to the snow/rain mix hit the windows. Instead of talking about doctors, pain, and medications, we began talking about the future.

“I know I keep saying it but I need a change,” I said. “I need less stress but I can’t afford to be without insurance.” Maybe I’ll work freelance and go back to school. I just want to do something that matters.”

I was sitting on the sofa dejected when I glanced down at the front page of the NY Post on my phone. It was then I noticed the horoscope section.

Under Sagittarius it said, “Yes, there is meaning to your life. Yes, you are here for a reason. What that reason is may not be obvious but if you keep your eyes and ears open today you may get a few clues. Then all you have to do is turn them into solutions.”

After reading this, I had an epiphany. I need to plot my future path like I approached my friend’s recovery. I’ll do it slow and intelligently until the baby steps lead to major progress.

Read Days 1-37:

#writing #blogger #spoonie #autoimmunedisease #invisibleillness #chronicillness #chronicpain #igg4 #disability #2018 #joythroughthepain #backpain #caregiver #gout #horoscope #sagittarius #nypost

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