Wasn’t Always Like This

I wasn’t always like this, I thought, as I talked to a co-worker about my difficulty swallowing pizza and the pain I suffer walking in the extreme cold. I told him that my joints stiffen and ache when the temperature drops. I end up walking like a Beefeater guard: rigid, slow and without a smile on my face.

My co-worker humored me by listening to me reminisce about my youth when I moved easily no matter what the weather. I told him how I played ice hockey, baseball and any other sport. Those were the years when I didn’t walk with a cane or take medication for pain or inflammation everyday.

As I limped away, I wondered if I sounded like I was on some pitiful trip down memory lane. Or, if I sounded like I was ashamed of my current state or embarrassed by my disability.

I wanted to stop my co-worker to tell him that I accomplish more in one day than a lot of able-bodied people; they I live a full life. And, If possible, I don’t allow my challenges to hinder me. But, when I saw him I didn’t bring it up. I just showed him by example that I am just fine as I am.

#Cane #spoonie #autoimmunedisease #invisibleillness #chronicillness #chronicpain #igg4 #disability #co-workers


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