From the second my fiancé slid a ring on my finger on Christmas Day three years ago, I wondered if it was fair to him for me to say yes. My doubt had nothing to do with whether I loved him; I was certain I did. I wondered if the autoimmune disease that damaged nearly every organ and joint in my body made me too much of financial and emotional burden to be anyone’s bride.  Still, I said yes and started planning like any woman would.

Of course, the first thing I thought about my dress. Up to this point, I’d only ever loved one dress, Bijou by Amsale. But, with a price over $8,000, I knew I couldn’t afford that and a reception so I tried to get it out of my mind. For days, I was melancholy thinking about how much money is spent on my various medication, procedures, surgeries, scans, x-rays and doctor visits over the years; that left me with little or no money to shell out for a wedding. Yet I was optimistic that I could work and save up the funds.
To read the rest of the essay, click on the link below:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nika-c-beamon/am-i-too-ill-to-wed_b_8272368.html